Tuesday, September 6, 2011

I Smell Dead People

WARNING: This post is potentially offensive to the anosmic.  Google it bitches!

I bet Zombie blood smells heavily of failure and broken dreams.  Not something you really want lingering on you as the world ends.  Permeating your clothes with it's unliving stank.  Forcing you to check your pits every time you're left alone.  Unless Tide is still driving that portable disaster relief truck around, anything you get on your clothes will most likely remain there.
DSC 0020
Boogers.  Another hidden threat to your nose.

Allow me to recommend a certified not-real Pretty & Putrid, grade-A splatter resistant poncho!  For all your undead muck and gut needs!  This handy, dandy plastic garb is clear to show off your finest ensemble while keeping unwanted  grossness from turning you into a walking PETA protest.  It also makes every outfit practical.  Add a belt for a form fitting enhancement.  With the P&P Poncho you will always look your best.  Unless your ugly.  Then you would just be an ugly in a rain poncho.
Wait for it...


Keep scrolling...

Whoomp!  There it is!

Naked fat lady
Wamp-waaaah...At least her clothes will stay dry!... oh... nevermind

I hope that image made you spit out your latte.  That "Venti 1 pump caramel, 1 pump white mocha, 2 scoops vanilla bean powder, extra ice frappuccino with 2 shots poured over the top (affogato style) with caramel drizzle under and on top of the whipped cream, double cupped" drink will be a forgotten luxury during the ZomPoc!   Enjoy and as always stay pretty and prepare!

1 comment:

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